What do you do during naps? I always think I can sleep when she sleeps and try, try so very hard but then spend the whole time trying to figure out if that is the best choice:
Go take a shower. No, if you move, she’ll wake up and then you’ll get no shower and no things done. Think of things you can do from right here. No, sleep is more important. Danggit. If only you had some sandpaper, you could start sanding down that new wooden toy you got so, you know, she doesn’t die when she eats the paint. They say it’s water-based… what does that really mean? Who are we kidding.. you only want to sand it down cause the colors are garish and natural wood would be so much nicer. You already read all the reviews on the natural wood one. None of the babies liked it. Keep the colors. Be happy it’s not plastic. Go to sleep. Everything smells like sour milk. Does it smell like strong sour milk or normal sour milk? Do you have a heightened nose!? You have been dizzy lately… and had lots of headaches… and been really tired… you’re probably pregnant again. Or have diabetes. I’d so much rather be pregnant than have diabetes. You should ask a doctor. No, they will only tell you it’s hormones and then you’ll be out a hundred bucks. Try to sleep. No, you should work out. You’re getting more mushy by the second. Give yourself a break – you just had a baby. And your tailbone is still broken. You just stay right there. Do it for your tailbone. Uh oh. She only has two diapers left. I should get them in the wash. Oh ya. Can’t move. Those blossoms out there are so pretty. I should go take a picture of them. No. You’ve already tried. It always turns out dark and ugly. Mom said we should paint them. We should paint them. Danggit I forgot to measure her head. Where is a tape measure? Who would have thunk I would be described as a crunchy momma (as per Urban Dictionary: Mother who supports homebirth, breastfeeding, baby wearing, cloth diapering, co-sleeping, gentle discipline, etc. One who questions established medical authority; tends to be vegetarian and/or prepare all-organic foods.) Who ARE you these days? I’m no hippie. Greg always calls me a hippie cause I don’t like to wear shoes unless they are fun shoes that are 6″ tall in which case I’d say that is very anti-hippie. Plus, I like meat. Except why? I always cry when I go by Harris Ranch and see all those cows about to go into burgers. I should be a vegetarian. Nope. Can’t do it. It just tastes so good. How is it already after noon? Bentley’s barking. You should take him on a walk. Oh ya, the baby.
And we are back to researching vaccines. The end.
In other news, why did family sing-alongs ever become a thing of the past? My heart would be so happy if this happened every night.
Hope you all had a great St. Patty’s Day! I know it’s a little late but it’s one of my favorite holidays so I had to at least mention it :)
Hehehe I love getting a peak inside your brain Hilly…. This is why I think you are one of the funniest people I know!
Oh I left so many things out!! I could have kept this going all day! ;)
That was so funny and SO true – I remember those days. You just CAN’T get anything done no matter how hard you try. I say just enjoy it.
PS: I LOVE St. Patrick’s Day too – (who am I kidding; I like them all – even Ground Hog Day!)
It’s SO hard to pick just one favorite!